Well fortunately I know my own internal language well enough not to have been shocked or dissuaded from exploring the image further. And so I entered the image, even before the dust had settled, and explored it with a little bit of lucid dreaming...
Thankfully this particular fallen tower had no bodies strewn about (as some tarot decks do)! Parts of the rubble hadn't really settled; there was still some movement going on, a bit like I imagine an earthquake would be - I simply stayed away from there. But I felt quite safe to walk amongst certain parts of what had been the tower, and to work with what was there.
I found what had been an underground fountain of sorts - it didn't take much to unclog the drains, and amazingly water began to flow from a pipe I hadn't seen before - the water was beginning to wash away the dust and there was the most beautiful image made from coloured tiles at the base of the fountain! The whole thing looked like it had been long forgotten, and before long, the colours began to show through more and more as the dust and grime washed away.
I walked then into what had been a walled garden, before the collapse of the tower had broken down 2 and a half of the walls. In the corner of the garden was a tree which was almost bare, but for one small flower. Before the collapse, the tree had been almost totally in shade, except for the branch which had the flower - it had stretched up into sunlight. Now the whole tree was bathed in sunlight, and I couldn't help but think that before long, the whole tree would be in bloom. I must admit that the flower surprised me - something so beautiful in the midst of all this rubble! I spent some time simply watching this flower - it seemed to awaken something in me, even though I couldn't quite articulate what that may have been.
After a time, I walked further then, into an area with what had been a beautifully manicured lawn. It had been so tidy, that I felt compelled to begin to move some of the rubble, to attempt to bring some order to the disorder all around. As I laid out the pieces of rubble, they began to form a pattern of sorts - I could see that I could, if I chose to, build a courtyard or a path of sorts, from the pieces of rubble. I wasn't sure yet, but I could see the possible outline.
I wanted to share this particular experience of lucid dreaming with you because it was so symbolic of what I see happening with clients who have been through, or who are going through, a particularly difficult, seemingly destructive period in their life. It can be so incredibly difficult to face the prospect of rebuilding one's life in the midst of this kind of experience, let alone after the dust has settled. The metaphors may seem a little simplistic, even cliched, but you'd be amazed at just how powerful such images can be, when you experience them yourself in your own personal story.
Here are a few key points to remember if you've been going through such a period:
* GIVE YOURSELF TIME
I find that clients often have feelings of desperately wanting to move on with their life - to get beyond the painful period they're going through. Sadly, painful emotional experiences need to be worked through so that they won't continue to effect you long afterwards. Really try not to make major decisions during this time if it's at all possible. Deciding to move house for example won't necessarily help you to feel renewed; nor will it effectively get you away from the painful emotions you're experiencing. Like the fountain in the dream above, you need to let your emotions flow for a little while, until they begin to 'run clean' and fresh and in a way which is soothing rather than painful.
* LEARN OR REDISCOVER HOW TO LISTEN TO YOUR OWN NEEDS
I've found that clients often need to rediscover, or learn, how to access parts of themselves which have been hidden or repressed during the difficult period they've been going through. In relationships, sadly we women in particular do have a tendency to resonate with our partner and their needs, rather than harmoniously also fulfilling our own. This is more likely if you've been going through the break down of a relationship. Rediscovering your deepest sense of your identity can be an incredibly healing experience, even if you're not sure about any other decisions in your life! Like the tree, you might have parts of yourself that have been hidden in the shadows - all they need is some conscious focus and attention from you to bring them back to growth.
* FOCUS ON SOMETHING CREATIVE
This may seem like a strange piece of advice, especially if you're focused on saving your marriage! But I've found in working with clients over time that even the most simple act of creativity, in the midst of a destructive time, can begin the process of reconnecting with your creative spirit. This can be something as simple as arranging some flowers! 'Creative' doesn't equate with 'artistic'. But by consciously putting your attention onto something you are 'bringing into being', you're simultaneously sparking off something incredibly powerful within your heart of hearts - you're activating your own creative fire. This is going to be a very important resource for you when you move more actively into the phase of rebuilding your life.